We are told that we should be creative, but we are hardly ever told what we should be creative about. If we assume that we are creating something, we usually create a mess. So what should we be creative about?
If we were to create something, who would we be creating it for? Yes we would be creating it for people, but considering we normally create more chaos than anything constructive let’s look at how people fit into this equation. When we create chaos and we almost do that without thinking and inevitably get ourselves into conflict with other people. Then due to the fact that we think we did not cause any chaos and because we always need to be right we remain in conflict with others. We do this with ease because as humans we will justify every action and in our reality we can’t be wrong. The problem is really that the conflict arises because the other person has a different agreement with reality, and they are also right. Remaining in conflict is thus extremely easy.
We wonder what caused the conflict in the first place and it can seem complex. The reality is that our communication caused the conflict and instead of continuing to communicate we try other so-called ‘easier’ tactics. We will hope it simply goes away, we will even ask people to forget or forgive us and sometimes we even try to buy our way out of things by giving gifts. Unfortunately these easy tactics are never effective.
The reason why there is conflict is because the communication left what is known as an open loop, causing others to ask questions like: What did we actually mean? When will they come back to me? Can they please tell me what I need to know?
Therefore we should be creative about handling conflict, looking for ways that will effectively close the communication loop! Instead of assuming we should simply ask if there is anymore we can say or do that would help clarify issues.
Keeping the lines of communication open is vital in resolving conflict and building relationships. It’s never easy and will always be a challenge, but that makes life extremely interesting.